mr. mittens (akmed) wrote,
mr. mittens

  • Mood:

miss puss, please take notes

first, stop eating all my butter. i leave the butter out in the winter because no one wants to try dragging a cold lump of fat across their toast to try and get it to spread and melt. i like toast. toast with unmelted butter is not good. eating an entire stick of butter can't be good, SYLVIA, for you. i give you moist food twice a day. i give you a perpetually filled bowl of dry food. you eat my dinner most of the time. please leave me some butter.

second, poop goes inside the litter box. i know you're pissed off because i work a lot now and am not at home to rake your litter garden every hour on the hour to your specifications. however ,this work allows me to buy you all the butter you can eat, cat litter,cat food and we don't have to live with obnoxious roommates who tend drink all the milk, use all the butter and usually move out leaving yet another cat behind. there are other ways for you to express your displeasure that are more socially acceptable- have you considered a livejournal account? you can crap there for the whole world to see and someone is bound to LOL you.

third- why are you staring at my toes? it's really unnerving me and i haven't figured it out yet.

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