mr. mittens (akmed) wrote,
mr. mittens

oddly satisfying and somewhat mystical consumer experience

you really have to go out to the suburbs to get any level of customer service in any of the larger stores. everyone is also, in general, more polite than in the ghettonotfabulousness of the more immediate boston area.

my tv is from 1988. it's not so much i'm cheap and haven't replaced it as it's just a great tv with a nice picture that's never had a down day. but now it's starting to make a humming noise that's not repairable and 20 years is pretty good mileage for an appliance of any sort nowadays.

so i researched on-line and although buying a big tv is cheaper that way it seems the delivery- often free ,if you can believe shipping of any sort that's free would be acceptable for an expensive fragile item-is fraught with problems and as i've the worst track record with deliveries to this crack-ass neighborhood i went OUT IN PUBLIC TO MALLS-ugh-to look and compare.

i am certain you could set yourself on fire and wave 1,000 dollar bills around and no one who works in best buy in watertown would look at you twice.part of the problem, i suppose, is the way i look. i don't look old enough to people( even though my hair is going grey for fuck's sake) to be worth their noncommissioned attention. this is part of the reason i shop on-line- they only see your money, not you, so it's all good.

2 gothlettes caught me glazed over like a honey dew donut saturday night in front a 50 tv screens, while one annoying , needy asian man got all the attention from salespeople. they practically gave him a blow job for a 32 inch set while i was waving my arms around yodeling 'jesu, joy of man's desiring' in front of the 50 inchers. of course,i had just got up from my post 80 hour week coma so i guess i wasn't my sharpest and i was wearing all black and leaning precariously to one side noticing how you have to be nearly dead center in front of most flat panel/ big screen tv's to see the picture properly.

i said fuck it and went to the 'burbs the next day where a delightful young man named bob looked up a million different sets and their locations for me, offered to pull the set i wanted from someone else's order and then tried to stuff persia's new bitch tranquilizer into HAL( box was 2 inches too wide or it would have fit. that HAL is quite the car).

so they'll deliver the tv in a day and i will never shop for anything big or expensive near the city again. no one was shopping in watertown and yet in the same store in dedham with about the same amount of customers around 3 people asked if i was being helped. curiously, there was also another boston gothlette in the store at the time.

next, i stopped a savers because they're always good for odd records and videos(ww2 arabic courses for GIs and' women on the verge of a nervous breakdown') and there was a giant framed picture of kate bush- the ninth wave photo from the hounds of love. so i had to get it and i noticed, when i checked out, that the hand basket i was using had score cards in it for....


and if you don't understand that reference you need to listen to a lot more kate bush because you're really missing out on something.

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