you must be certain of the devil.
i try not to listen when i know i'm on to something that's not quite right. as much as i wish it were not so- most people do not deserve the benefit of doubt. the wax is going to melt, the feathers are going to fall off and icarus is hitting the ground, hard and will usually land on you so get out of the fucking way , just like the cops always say-
"there's nothing to see here... move along."
i just see circuits now wires and connections that work or dont...i cant see people -just in the way of my grid. the wires never lash out at me not like with people- no sparks, no fires, no smoldering resentment- a field of light and copper wires..sounds from metal. i can hear the occasional off kilter cycle hum from the edison plant next door and i dont care if anyone else hears it. it keeps me up.
as a child i compulsively took apart things and reassembled them. now i take apart people around me, in a moment. seeing the innards, its best to forget about any connections- there are none that are feasable. the voltages dont match and nothing's grounded.
what the fuck am i doing here? who left me and why? i understand the things around me and i dont like it one bit. i'm taking my toys and dedicating my life to the truly gifted and also the truly needy- crack whores and orphaned kittens-
im walking out of sorts through central square. a woman asks me for a cigarette. i give her one. then she says
" ok ,so, now we have a date, right? it will be 5 dollars."
im thinking," wow thats the best offer ive had in a long time".. and so reasonable. i mean you can barely get a drink or a pack of smokes for that amount. costs more to go to most clubs and usually the same satisfaction is not to be had so easily, so honestly so ungarnished with triviana and bloated yet somehow limp ego enhancements.
the devil is in the details and im stripping them to the bone-ill pay for a blow job but i am most certainly not giving them.
hic sunt leones. dont even bother. once youre pegged and changed into a toad- theres no where to go but to hop into the pond slime with everyone else.